RSVP

"RSVP" is an initialism of the French phrase, "répondez s'il vous plaît." Usually found on an invitation, the writer requests you to “Please respond.”

This message is conveyed strictly with words on paper. Therefore, an appropriate response can be a simple written confirmation. “Yes, I will attend.”

Human interaction gets a lot more complicated when it happens in real-time and in real life. Body language becomes at least a part of your communication.

(Funny name, body language. Because there is no shared vocabulary, let alone rules for grammar, in the movement and expression of human beings.)

People are requesting you to respond all the time. Your response can be categorized on a grid with four quadrants.

Active communication is open and honest, while passive communication is closed and non-responsive. An active response is usually accompanied by eye contact and enthusiastic and authentic support. A passive response might be delayed and can be low energy or quiet.

Constructive communication is focused on resolving conflicts and finding solutions, while deconstructive communication involves attacking and criticizing.

Quick example: your colleague shares how he/she just finished an exciting conversation with a new client.

An example of a deconstructive & passive response would be: “Good for you, I just replied to seven e-mails” while shrugging your shoulders and not taking your eyes off your screen. An example of a constructive & active response would be: “That’s a great start to the day. What will the two of you be working on?” while maintaining eye contact with your colleague.

After studying this topic, Gable found that only responses that were perceived to be active and constructive were associated with greater personal well-being and higher relationship quality. By responding this way, you can support the people around you in good times and bad, sickness and health.

Do you?